By: Stephanie Davies

So you are tired and stressed out day after day. You've had thoughts of yoga, meditation, and soothing spa experiences, but you either don't have the time to do those things, or it is beyond your reach right now. Let me show you a few very simple, simple relaxation techniques that you can use at any time, without any effort or previous knowledge to accomplish - using candles! That's right, using candles. Almost everyone has a candle in the house, most of us have several, and if you don't have one, the nearest store is sure to have a grand selection.

To begin, you don't need to have any certain type of candle. Almost any candle will work, big or small, soy candles, paraffin candles, beeswax candles, scented or unscented! Of course, scents will help with the relaxation, so I will give you a few ideas on which fragrances to use to help you to fully enjoy the benefits of candle relaxation.

Lavender is the fragrance most renowned for it's relaxation benefits in aromatherapy. It's a common ingredient in products aimed at relaxation and stress relief, such as pillows, bath oils, soaps and lotions. However it may not be the right fragrance for you. Some people find particular scents relaxing while others do not. For instance, the fragrance of warm cinnamon buns may smell like heaven to me, but may make you want to run to higher ground! Other fragrances may have bad memories attached to them in your own mind. For that reason, I recommend that you take into account your own personal preferences in choosing the scented products that are right for you. Other fragrances that have a strong reputation for relaxation are: chamomile, vanilla, ylang ylang, clary sage, bergamot, frankincense, and sandalwood. Although if you have strong allergies or are highly sensitive to scented items, we recommend going with an unscented candle for your own relaxation.

The color of the candle you use is very important when you are using candles for relaxation purposes. Use calming, muted colors to relax, such as pale blues, greens, white, or violet. Bright colors such as reds, oranges, and yellows can be stimulating to the mind and might make it harder to fully relax. I personally recommend candles of a blue color to relax, but if you personally really hate the color blue, you may use any light color that pleases your eye.

The first way to use candles in relaxation and stress relief is a very simple, yet utterly effective method. Simply take a deep breath, and stare at the flame of the candle while it is lit. Focus in on the area at the base of the wick where the flames color is blue. Watch how the colors subtly change as you stare into the flame. Take deep, calming breaths while relaxing and simply focusing on the candle flame. It helps if this is done in a darkened room, however the exercise is effective even while in a brightly lit space.

Another simple method for candle relaxation is to take your candle and a small pin or other object to "write" on the candle, and write the word "Relax" vertically on the surface of the candle. As the candle burns, on each letter, meditate on a single thought. It can be anything you want as long as it is a positive thought. As the candle burns to a new letter, change to a different meditative thought. This is a way of meditating while having a "timer" (the candle) to set a slow but relaxing pace while giving you a focus for your meditation.

Finally, candles and water can be an extremely effective combination. I recommend using floating candles in a combination with the first technique, or alternatively to place a candle in a bowl and place small attractive rocks or crystals around the base to anchor it, then placing a small amount of water in the bottom of the bowl. This is not only helpful for relaxation, but is also very decorative and in itself holds many ideas for decorating your home.

Of course, the act of simply having lit candles is very relaxing in itself. Whether simply around the house, in the bathtub, or during intimate moments, candles can enhance and bring peacefulness to our hectic lives. So the next time you are looking for a quick way to de-stress and ground yourself, look no further than the wax and wick!